Saturday, June 02, 2007

Tired Little One

1. I spoke to a homeboi of mine a few days ago
2. I had a dream
3. The number 934 has been haunting me
4. I've been disappointed
5. I had to say goodbye to my sister/friend/spiritual guru
6. I keep forgetting that my brother is physically dead
7. I made the same mistake again
8. I'm escaping
9. I've deleted numbers...yet again
10. I've avoided assistance
11. I danced for my mama, my brother, and my pain
12. I've said things that I later regretted
13. I've been sleeping less
14. I've danced long and hard
15. I checked out of relationships
16. I checked back into me
17. I admitted that I'm not ready to go to my brother's grave
18. I hugged my mama and tried to get lost
19. I've smiled and masked a lot
20. I've battled my fatigue by adding more and more to my plate
21. I tried to open up
22. I decided opening up for others is a bad idea
23. I didn't make it to a year
24. I've made some new friends
25. I went to the shooting range and I did a really good job
26. I've hugged more babies and children
27. I've talked to my dad more this year than I have in years
28. I visited my grandma
29. I've gone on dates
30. I met someone who reminded me of someone I used to know
31. I fell in love with good music...again
32. I found out that my mama is a groundhog rambo...lol
33. I behaved irresponsibly
34. I behaved responsibly
35. I sang loudly
36. I was Peaches
37. I learned how to up my Atlanta lingo and dance vocabulary...thanks to the children and Angelina
38. I met and danced with some really fun brothas at the Q
39. I've gotten really good hugs from a friend of mine once a week for a month
40. I got straight A's spring semester in spite of the trauma and demands of the year (3 people I know died - 1 due to violence, 2 car accidents on 285, sickness forcing me into the emergency room, 1 paid GRA position, 1 unpaid GRA position, 4 classes, writing my thesis proposal, performing, choreographing, being friend, being god-mama, being daughter, being cousin, being sister, learning about my spiritual responsibilities, and volunteering). This one REALLY felt good...I hope my brother is proud of me.

This was started as a list for me to refer back to. I wanted to make a list from which I would write better developed thoughts. I'm still going to attempt to do that, and this felt like something that I should post too. So...I did.

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