Tuesday, December 26, 2006

What more can I do?

Loads of bile keep getting shoveled and dumped at my weary feet...Guy! I really try my hardest to stay positive, and it's getting rough folks! Yo! This has been the year from hell and I......AM......SO......TIRED. It wasn't all bad, AND the bad was/is pretty frickin bad! Wanna know how hellish? Here goes (everything will NOT be listed cause I really don't have that kinda time):
1. Lied to
2. Manipulated
3. Lied on
4. Deceived (by elders and a coward)
5. Thwarted
6. Damaged by health care workers incompetence
7. Lost my brother
8. Had to read my family
9. Witnessed my mama falling apart
10. Fell apart on my own
11. Learned some life altering news about someone
12. Disappointed by sisterfriends
13. Let some friends go
14. Watched many of my homegirls be disregarded and disrespected by their partners
15. Lost control
16. Betrayed by "friends"
17. Gave up on people
18. Ignored my own grief
19. Found out a friend of mine has full-blown AIDS
20. Disappointed by brothas
21. I can't continue this list...it is REALLY bumming me out!

Can I get just a damn moment without all of this hell? Just a moment...I'm saying though! I want some more heaven to balance this hell out! I've said it before and I'll say it again...Can you give me a second to deal with the shit you laid in front of me before you drop another load of mess at my feet? I'm sick of cleaning up all the damn time! I've got a serious bone to pick with the universe right now...and that ish ain't pretty...it's dizzying.


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